User Profile

My storm is coming and I will be good to just be able to breathe. I cannot change much of anything that is for sure. At this current phase, all I have are the random words that accumulate in my brain. I am hoping to at least just capture even the minuscule moments so that I will remain half way sane.

I fight myself instead of letting it happen as it should. I fear making a mistake, instead of learning from what mistakes should happen. I'm forever flawed, nailing myself to my own cross that I force myself to bear. I should live the moment instead of sketching out my own dictation of time. I am selfish and unkind, caught up in my own devices. I admit my wrongs but refuse the allowances of my rights. A living contradiction is what I will always be. I am not at all what I seem for I will never be the boy of life. You will never love me for I am the infinite sadness. It is my desire to see through the superficiality of all things and plunge through the surface for the deeper level. I am always attracted to things that can make me feel and make me realize that I am still alive.

I caught myself from a fatal fall but still I have fallen from grace, perhaps to a damnation of eternity, a success only few can hope for because I have yet to settle for a complacent life. As Rach would say, “Yer eyes must do some raining if you ever wanna grow.”
Suffer my desire.

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